The name of the Zvezdochet cafe tucked away down the graceful sweep of Ulitsa Marata means astrologer, but as we arrived we had no way of telling what the future held in what is reputedly one of St Petersburg's hipper eateries.
One problem was doubtless the shady decor which made reading the menu, never mind the arcane astrological symbols, an exercise in deduction and ingenuity.
However, we eventually managed to decipher the page upon page of delicious-sounding courses and, having made our decisions, sat back to revel in the otherworldly atmosphere.
The slowness of the service gave us more than ample opportunity to do so, and my companion was particularly awe-struck by the ceiling where an apparently comprehensive map of the universe jostled for neon illumination with cryptic sphinxes.
When our starters finally arrived, however, untrue to the decor, there was little enigmatic about them.
All the promised ingredients were there, but in mine at least, something alchemical had happened, making a simple sounding beef salad (streletskaya, 14,500 roubles) into an absolutely divine feast. The meat was tender and the piquant cheese-garlic-egg-mayonnaise dressing complemented the salad perfectly.
My companion didn't stray from the sacred cow, and opted for the pikantny beef salad (20,000) which despite its name was nowhere near as flavorsome as mine, being a rather bland blend of meat with cucumber and tomato.
Other deceptively huge salads that might have done a similarly effective job in leaving us gasping before the second course were the stolichnaya (17,000) and the tongue (21,000).
Feeling warm and comfortable on our curvy sofa, as much from the hearty fare as from the alleged protection of the runes painted on the walls and windows, we floated on to the pre-main courses with not a worry in our becalmed hearts.
However, the runes must have been ruing our complacency, because with a double dose of evil spirit influence, we submitted to the charms of vodka and to the suddenly increased malignancy of the waiter who became evilly slow and sullen.
Nonetheless, the long-delayed crab cocktail (30,400) and its staggered partner of mushrooms with smetana (sour cream) for 19,600 roubles, were a treat.
The former was deliciously light and lemony in its mayonnaise sauce and salad garnish, the latter not really delicate enough: instead of the usual wafer-thin slices of mushroom, which work so well with the slightly glutinous sauce, I had to contend with large untender fungi halves.
This was a shame, as the sauce was lovely, a well-executed fondue. These little dishes were just the right size for a three-course extravaganza, but the solyanka (15,000) might be a more filling choice for those only trying two courses.
On to the main part of the meal (allegedly), and a disappointment.
Our slightly hazy vodka benevolence might have led us to suspend criticism, but the main courses were definitely sub-standard.
The first time I came to the restaurant I was in raptures over the delicately flavoured cod with cheese and lemon (32,600), but in the spirit of enterprise ventured out into the red meat section.
Several times rebuffed through non-availability of various beef dishes (including the appetizing sounding Milan beef -- 43,500 -- with cheese and garlic), I finally opted for the minimally descriptive escalope (42,000) and was presented with a leathery fatty piece of meat which was fairly unpleasant.
The surrounding garnishes -- chips, coleslaw and tomatoes -- were all fine, and once my starry-eyed partner had swapped my escalope for his pork with mushrooms and cheese (48,000), I began to feel a renewed calm.
This dish was far superior, the meat tender and the sauce, cunningly appropriated from my second course, worked well on the whole.
We could have finished the meal with ice-cream (7,200), but didn't, being almost unbearably full.
Instead we reclined on our sofa and listened to the tranquil live jazz which was an odd modern intrusion into our ancient pagan world.
Assured of our Leo-Libra incompatibility, we nevertheless came out onto the street feeling complete, satisfied with our long and spiritually enlightening evening in the company of St Petersburg's star-gazers.